When I taught middle school students and repeatedly butted heads with a certain student and was at my wit’s end for dealing with him (yes, usually a him), I would “walk and talk” (thanks to Tom Daly of The ADHD Solution) with that child. I would find a convenient excuse to have that child walk with me to the copy room, office, or some other location and I would choose NOT to bring up his behavior in class. This gave us an opportunity to just walk in silence and he would usually break the silence by asking me how my day was going, what he could do to improve his grades, or something else just to strike up conversation. I would reciprocate with one or two of my own questions, and by the end of our short walk, we had connected on a “non-school” level and the tension between us had greatly diminished.
I encourage all parents who wish to ease any tension with their child or even connect with them on a deeper level to go “walk and talk” with your child. Have no agenda, just take some time get some fresh air and exercise with your child. (And here in San Diego we have a such great opportunities for walks with our gorgeous beaches and numerous parks.) It really is an ideal time for you and your child to just spend some quality time together and relax. You’ll be surprised at what can come up when you’re both in this relaxing space with no agenda and nothing to do but to walk and just be together.
This Friday afternoon it’s crystal clear and about 70 degrees out (in January!). Why not take advantage and just “walk and talk” with your child? Even if your child doesn’t open up or even talk, rest assured that you’re planting seeds of connection and trust, and if you do it often enough, the chances are great that you’ll experience more connection with your child.
On a separate note, I’d like to plug a relatively new website: www.thumbtack.com. You can post your services or product on this website for free, and it automatically links to Craigs List, Google, Bing, and Yahoo. You can check out my tutoring listing on thumbtack here: Professional Tutors in North County and SanDiego
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